Not Putting Up With It

I got a phone call last week from an HR rep at my office. I was surprised, but then remembered that I had made a complaint about a girl I work with who is very unprofessional. She frequently talks about sex, or makes sexual references or even asks people sexual questions. I had complained about her once before a few months ago, and assumed they talked to her about it. She seemed a little better for a while and then she moved teams and we didn't sit on the same row anymore. I was so relieved.

Two weeks ago she suddenly sat on my row again and in the first 10 minutes I heard her ask a newly married kid how the sex was on his honeymoon. He responded quickly and then rushed away embarrassed. There were a few other things she mentioned in those few minutes that made me really uncomfortable, so I reported it.

Come to find out, when I should have had privacy and been protected by my company, she guessed it was me and the HR rep said that whoever talked to her didn't deny or confirm it was me. What does that mean? I think it means they didn't protect me! She is now saying that I am targeting her and that I sat by her on purpose to get her in trouble.

The HR rep asked why, if I had a problem with her, didn't I move desks so I wouldn't have to sit by her. I work once a week, and other than those encounters with her, never thought about her at all. I complained, assumed they would talk to her about it,hoping she would engage in more professional behavior. As far as continuing to sit where I did, it's because that is where I am comfortable! It honestly never occurred to me to move and anyway I shouldn't have to move where I sit once a week because some girl can't be professional and keep her thoughts to herself! She created this hostile environment, I didn't.

This experience has been mortifying. The HR rep mentioned they have to check into my background to see if this a regular problem I have....complaining about people. I realize this is just HR protocol, but I feel stupid and embarrassed. I have worked for my company for 15 years. I have had a great experience there and they have treated me well. I don't have any serious issues to my knowledge and I try really hard to be a good employee. But this girl is more powerful than me. I have a voice, but she has a stronger one and I am not good at fighting against that. I doubted myself the morning I got that call, wondering if I did the right thing. But, the more I think about it, I know I did the right thing. What she does is offensive and I don't want to listen to it. I think others might feel the same way, but are afraid to say so.

It is going to be awkward going to work for awhile. I actually called in sick Monday because I was afraid. I should have been protected with anonymity, but since I don't think I was, I guess I will deal with it the best I can. All I know is, I get enough negative influence from the rest of the world, I don't need it at work too. I AM NOT PUTTING UP WITH IT!!!