Ellen the Idol killer

Neal here. I just had to go on a quick tirade about the recent appointment of Ellen Degradation as an American Idol judge.

During moments like this, we say what we often say when watching television: "What the heck are they thinking?" Normally, the answer to that question is, "they weren't," but here's what I think they were thinking: They're pulling a Dennis Miller.

Remember about 10 years ago when Monday Night Football brought in a COMEDIAN to offer opinions and insights on the game? I'd imagine they thought they could make football more universally appealing by bringing in someone who knows nothing about the game but how to make snide, inane comments about it. I'd imagine that's what a lot of disgruntled housewives and nerds were doing anyway (maybe that was their target market). Of course, instead of making the game more approachable for an untapped audience, everyone ELSE who watches MNF called for Dennis Miller's head on a pike. Why? Oh yeah, cuz he knows jack about the game.

I'm sure by the end of the season, we'll wanna lych Ellen Degenerate for the same reason. Oh wait, I already do.

America is stupid, but we're not that stupid. We can smell a cheap ploy by program exec's to boost ratings a mile away. All I can do is hope that they'll wake up and smell what their shoveling before they kill Idol.

I wonder what else is gonna be on during that time slot...

Chocolate drip please

I feel depression coming on. I've been trying to avoid it, but after my doctor's visit today....and seeing several very pregnant women, I can't help it anymore. I got some good advice from friends on Facebook last week to eat lots of ice cream and chocolate. I've done some of that, but now what? How do I deal with the fact that after 2 years of trying I finally got pregnant, only to have a miscarriage? I just have so many questions and a lot of heartache. When is it going to be my time? My doctor said that I need to become really athletic....yeah, right. I am working on a plan but it's going to be hard, especially since all I want is something deep-fried and smothered in chocolate!

Well, I don't really feel better. I just feel..... NARCISSISTIC.

Operation Starve

Olivia told me yesterday I'm fat and I have a fat tummy. Twice.

I felt bad.

I worked out hard after that.

I will be posting a few pictures of what I USED to look like so I can feel better.

Maybe one day I'll get back to the younger, sexier me. In the meantime, I think I will starve myself.

Kids say the funniest things....

Joseph: "Mom, my lips feel so weird. Can you get me some chopstick?"

Olivia: "Mom will you blow on my triceratops?" (she was eating dinosaur chicken nuggets)

Me: "Olivia, please stop hitting your brother. Olivia: "Okay mom, I promise to keep hitting Joseph."

Joseph: "There's nothing like a nice cup of cold water to get my blood sugar going."
Joseph: "Mom, I am hypoglycemic. I need some candy to help my blood sugar.
Joseph: "My taste buds cry...can you hear them?"

The other night when I was putting the kids to bed I had to get after them a little because they wouldn't settle down. As I was leaving the room I heard Olivia say, "She is brutal." Joseph said..."Yeah."

On the day that Joseph turned 6 he informed me that he could now do whatever he wants. He also told me that now he is 6 he is not afraid of anything and he can handle "stuff."

Heart to Heart

As I was tucking Joseph into bed the other night he said "Mom, can we have a heart to heart talk?" I was so surprised he used that phrasing I laughed...but he was totally serious. We ended up talking about what makes boys and girls different. It wasn't quite the kind of "heart to heart" conversation I was expecting to have. Without getting to descriptive, what he really wanted to know was why certain things happen to boys. Joseph is turning 6 in a few weeks....but isn't he awfully young to be asking those kinds of questions? I always pictured us sitting down and explaining it to him...when he was 12...not almost 6!!!

Does anyone else out there have any good "heart to heart" conversations they'd like to share?

Garden Nerds

Neal and I are garden nerds. Our yard is too small for a big garden, but we really wanted to try something, so we did a box garden. We can't stop looking at it. We totally geek out when we see any small growth. I can't wait to see what it will produce!! (ha, get it...produce?)